The Judge
While walking through a courthouse, a kid enters an empty courtroom. He
sees a fine leather briefcase (the kind the lawyers carry) sitting on
the table, picks it up and exits through the back door of the courtroom
into the judge's chambers.
And who should be sitting there; the judge.
Judge: Hey kid, are you familiar with the liquor store across the
street from the courthouse?
Kid: (nods).
Judge: Good, I want you to go across the street and steal me a bottle
of booze.
The kid runs across the street, enters the liquor store, and when the
proprietor is not looking, slips a fifth into the briefcase and brings
it back to the judge.
The judge immediately opens the bottle and swigs half of it.
Judge: Hey kid, I need you to run another errand. There's a contractor,
Slapdash Construction, next to the liquor store. Go to them and tell
them that the judge sent you. They'll give you a brown paper bag. Bring
it back to me.
The kid runs to Slapdash Construction, tells them that the judge sent
him, receives a brown paper bag filled with fifties and hundreds, puts
it into the briefcase and takes it to the judge.
Judge: Kid, you did great. Now unzip my fly.
The kid unzips the judge's fly.
Judge: Now take it out and---
Kid: Hey wait a minute mister. I'm not a real attorney; I just found
this briefcase in the courtroom!!